think, write, share

Sorry guy that I haven’t made a post in a while. As you know, some friends of mine from High School are visiting, so it’s been one huge adventure after another. So far, I’ve put almost 1600 miles on my car, so we’ve spent much time in it.

We’ve been to: Anaheim, the Getty Museum, Santa Monica, Hollywood, Universal Studios (including dinner at CityWalk), Newport Beach, Monterey, a baseball game at PacBell Park, JapanTown (in SF), Fisherman’s Wharf, Alcatraz, and Napa.

We’re doing the coastal tour tomorrow (17 Mile Drive, Santa Cruz, Half Moon Bay) and hanging out with my buds in the evening. Should be a fun day!

After Erik leaves on Sunday, but I’m leaving on Wednesday for New York. Brian is staying at my place, taking care of my cats and looking for a job. So you may get a post from me on Monday or Tuesday. Don’t hold your breath
I’ll post some pictures, and I’d have others…if it weren’t for the fact that my idiot friends left my digital camera on a bench on Pier 39. Grr, I’m pissed. Hopefully, it’ll turn up with the police, but I’m not crossing my fingers. It’s not really the losing of the camera that pisses me off, so much as the losing of the 70+ pictures we took at Alcatraz. Grr.

But all in all, it’s been a fun vacation. It’s great having them out here. We’ve had a blast.

Ok, suffice to say that I doubt that I will be anything resembling productive today at work. Some friends of mine from NY are flying in tonight and they’re going to be visiting me for the next week or so. We have so many things planned, that I feel like I’m going to be more of a chauffeur and hotel than anything else. But it’s cool, since I haven’t seen these guys in ages.

We’re planning on hitting SoCal this weekend, going to a Giants game on Tuesday, Alcatraz on Wednesday, up to Napa, down to Monterey, Leguna Seca, Santa Cruz at some point and of course, excursions up to SF. I’m going to see if I can make plans with my friends out here as well.

As my custom, I made a CD for the trip down to LA. Here’s the track listing. I don’t want to hear anything from you guys about my choice in music
CD Title: LA 2002

1. Slick Shoes - Friday Night
2. Britney Spears - Overprotected
3. Avalon - Testify to Love
4. Goo Goo Dolls - Here is Gone
5. Hoobastank - Running Away
6. Our Lady Peace - Somewhere Out There
7. Jars of Clay - Love Song for a Savior
8. Nickelback - Too Bad
9. Staind - Ephiphany
10. Staind - For You
11. The Calling - Adrienne
12. Default - Deny
13. Hoobastank - Crawling in the Dark
14. Jimmy Eat World - The Middle
15. John Mayer - No Such Thing
16. No Doubt - Hella Good
17. Pink - Don’t Let Me Get Me
18. Sense Field - Save Yourself
19. Slick Shoes - Alone
20. Trik Turner - Friends and Family
21. Vanessa Carlton - A Thousand Miles

I never realized this before, but I have trust issues.

I never thought I had trouble believing what people said. But looking back on things stemming as far back as 6th grade, apparently it’s true. It’s probably a result of insecurity or maybe just due to the people I am around, but I have a tendency to doubt the intentions of other people. I tend to overanalyze things to death, and I spend way too much time thinking about things, when they don’t really merit it.

Unfortunately, I have to deal with this problem on my own. It’s something I need to be able to do, one incident at a time. I need to stop dwelling on little things, to stop creating fantastic scenarios in my head and I need to stop being paranoid about people’s intentions.

It’s been an odd couple of days. Friday and Saturday nights were good, Saturday night in particular. Sunday was alright, a pretty dreary, down, grey kind of day. The fact it was cold and rainy caused more of the dreariness than my emotional state.

There’s nothing worse than false assumptions and uncertainty in certain matters.

But there are fewer things than a long, unexpected phone call late in the evening to help you forget about everything else for a while.

Sometimes I wonder if anyone understands me. I know some people think they understand who I am, but they’re mistaken. I know some people think they know me, but they really don’t. There are very, very few people who I consider close friends and what they know barely scratches the surface.

After all, if I don’t understand myself, how can anyone else?