ok, it’s a pretty sad state of affairs when ducky has managed 18 posts since the last time i wrote anything here (22 since the last non-meme post). so here goes. i promise that it probably won’t make sense unless you know me.

joe m: jeff, why are you wearing a tie?
jeff: ask tina why she’s wearing a skirt
joe m: tina, when i asked jeff why he’s wearing a tie he told me to ask you why you’re wearing a skirt. why are you wearing a skirt?
tina: because jeff is wearing a tie

my garbage cans went awol on friday, but i’m getting new ones today. but someone left some in front of my house yesterday. i’m confused too.

i got a real letter in the mail yesterday. stamps and everything. from a kiwi, who i haven’t spoken to in years. it made me really happy.

tina: jeff’s making chili
jeff: i’m doing what?
tina: chili. i need to find four people to make chili for the cookoff.
jeff: i’ve never made chili
tina: it’s easy!
jeff: but i don’t have a crock pot
tina: oh
jeff: you find me a crock pot and i’ll do it
marilyn: i have an extra one!
jeff: doh…
(it’s prolly gonna be called “Demon Duck Pooh Bear chili”. better than Jan’s “fire-in-your-bunghole chili”)

do you carry maps in your car? who doesn’t? oh, that’s right, na doesn’t…

here’s nothing like sharing fart stories to bring two people closer

i check my bank account balances daily to see if my tax refund has come it. i’m really looking forward to it. why? so i can pay my property taxes with it…

there’s more, i’m sure. but i should get back to work. maybe i’ll elaborate more later