father’s day has come and past and to be perfectly honest, i’m glad and relieved that it’s over. the last few weeks, i’ve been bombarded with father’s day related media: ads in the paper, commercials on tv, articles in the local paper. i felt choked up a little and a tear came to my eyes during the general intercessions at mass yesterday when we prayed for the fathers who had passed from this life into the next and for those of us who mourn for them.

i’ve dreaded the arrival of father’s day ever since the death of my father last october. while i can’t remember the last time i actually saw my father on father’s day, i always treasured the phone conversation i had with him. he would always say that he didn’t want a gift and that all he wanted was to talk to my sister and i. i can still hear his voice in my head and a mixture of joy and sadness fills my heart.

he was my hero growing up and my idol. he was the person i knew i wanted to be and the father i hope that i can be in the future. my interest in engineering came from him, as well as my sense of financial responsibility. i learned respect for my family and i learned how to love the game of baseball. he taught me how to fish, how to drive a car and how to be a man. while there’s a part of me which is angry that he was taken from my mom, sister and i at such an early age, i know how blessed and lucky i was to have known him for 27 years of my life as many people never get that opportunity. he sacrificed a lot for his family but never complained about it. the joy and pride he felt for us wasn’t expressed in words; you could tell from the way he looked at us and talked about us to his friends and relatives. i can only pray that when my time comes to leave this life, i will have impacted even a fraction of the people that my father did.

one of the things about father’s day that i was dreading was spending it alone. my mind tends to wander into dangerous depths when i’m idle and not keeping myself busy. but thankfully, she was there to spend the day with me, from shortly after i woke up until shortly before i went to sleep. i don’t know what i would have done without her support. so even though i didn’t say so last night, thank you for being there for me. you’ve been amazing to me.

i miss you, dad. i hope that you’re watching over me and keeping me safe. i wish i could share all the experiences that i will have in the future with you. but most of all, i want to say thank you for everything that you’ve done for me, for mom and for sis while you were still with us.

i love you…